Is anyone else having a hard time realizing that 2013 has come to an end?
I sure am!
When I sat down to ponder my life and wait on the Lord for fresh promises and words of hope at the end of 2012, I had no idea all that would transpire over the coming 365 days. Honestly, if you would have told me what would happen in 2013 for Edgar and I, there's a good chance I would not have believed you...
I wouldn't have believed that my husband would get laid off from his job...
...that we would have to sell the lovely home we had just built...
...that we would leave [yet another] precious community of amazing friends...
...that we would move back "home" to Dallas...
...that our adoption would be postponed longer than we ever imagined...
...that we would get to be part of our beloved Gateway Church again...
...that we would hear God tell us to begin fostering...!
...that we would get a puppy...!
This year has been full of some of the highest highs and the lowest lows we have ever walked through. But for each goodbye, there has been a hello. For each closed door, there has been an open door just around the corner. For each tear, there have been smiles to far outweigh the heartache.
And on this first day of January, the first day of this brand new year, I can't help but realize how God is shifting things in our lives. He has brought Edgar and I into a place where we are doing the very things we said we would "NEVER" do! That would be a good theme for us for 2013: shifting and shaking everything that could possibly be shaken and bringing us into Never Never Land. And in the shifting, in that testing, He does new and beautiful things that we can hardly comprehend.
So we have had a few new things going on over here... The first is that we did indeed get a brand new little puppy! She is the biggest surprise of our lives because Edgar and I were the couple that had said we would "never" get a dog. And I can hardly even grasp how it happened, all I know is that we saw her and instantly fell in love and knew she was supposed to be our dog. And trust me, we were just as shocked as our family and close friends were! We named her Schatje which means "little treasure" in Dutch, and our sweet little Schatje is the gift we never knew we needed.
But of far greater significance...we have begun the process of becoming foster parents...!
"What?!" you say? That's exactly what we said too when we first realized it. Become foster parents? Who in their right mind wants to do that? Fostering was yet another thing I "never" wanted to do. Can you imagine loving children as your very own only to have them ripped from you with barely a moments notice? Fostering children sounded like the most profoundly painful heartache and I was not in the least bit interested in voluntarily putting myself through that kind of pain...
But God has a way of shifting things in our lives and hearts in such a strategic way and He brings it all about in His perfect timing. From where I sit now, having a heart freshly shattered by His love (and also partly because of this book), I cannot imagine being more excited and passionate about fostering than I am now. What a precious opportunity to love on children, to help them find healing and to shepherd their precious hearts for however long God gives them to us.
A few weeks ago we began the process of "foster-to-adopt" with a local agency and this month we will start the required 30+ hours of required training. What does "foster-to-adopt" mean? We will take a child or a sibling group into our home while their parents work on meeting whatever requirements CPS has set up for them to earn their kids back. The average time foster children stay in a foster home under this scenario is 12-18 months. If at the end of this time the parents have been unable/unwilling to live up to the requirements CPS gave them, their parental rights will be terminated and we will be able to adopt the child/children.
Are we still adopting our little child from Uganda? YES. Though the wait has become longer than anyone anticipated and several families above us have dropped out of the program (putting us now at #21 on the waiting list) we feel like God has told us to stick it out and continue trusting Him with Uganda.
With all that said, my mind short circuits whenever I try to picture what 2014 could look like. I can't help but think that our God wants to do so much more in each of our lives this coming year than ever before. I believe He wants to pour Himself out in greater ways than we have ever experienced, that He wants to give us fresh faith and hope in who He is. I want each of us to believe Him more than we ever dreamed possible.
But that is often our problem: belief. Have you ever struggled with belief? with faith? with hope? Perhaps because you have been disappointed when you hoped for something...or maybe God didn't seem to come through for you when you cried out to Him. I don't know why you might struggle with belief from time to time, but I can say that I'm right there with you in the struggle.
My constant prayer is "Lord, I do believe! and please help my unbelief!" Have you ever prayed that?
Mary and Martha believed Jesus would heal their brother. The disciples believed Jesus would heal Lazarus. Yet oddly, Jesus delayed in arriving on the scene. After waiting until it was "too late", Jesus told His disciples in John 11, "Lazarus died. And I am glad for your sakes that I wasn't there. You're about to be given new grounds for believing..." Sometimes we can't explain why God delays in answering our prayers or why He goes about it not directly but by taking the long way around, but I do know that no matter what you are believing God for, He is faithful and He will always do what He says He will do.
Instead of giving them an instant miracle, Jesus takes Mary and Martha and His disciples on the long way around. To frustrate and disappoint them? NO! To set the stage for glorifying the Father and building their faith. The faith and awe and adoration that grew in their hearts for Jesus after seeing Lazarus raised from the dead was so much richer and deeper and eternal than if Jesus had simply showed up "on time" and healed Lazarus while he was yet living.
"Then Jesus looked her in the eye, 'Didn't I tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?"' (John 11:40) Friends, look with me into the eyes of Jesus and let's hear Him telling us that... Let's put our faith in the One who makes all things new, the One who brings the prodigals home and sets the captives free, the One who places the lonely in families and heals the brokenhearted. Let's break out of our "never" boxes and let Him do fresh things, new things in our lives. Don't you want to believe Him for more this year than ever before??!
From our little family to yours, we wish you love, we wish you peace, we wish you joy in this New Year as we celebrate all that means most to us. Our reason to celebrate and rejoice in these holy-days has been because Jesus Christ humbled Himself and came to earth to ransom us and restore life and hope to all of humanity. It is because of His life that we now have life, and not just any life, but an ABUNDANT life of great joy and hope.
I sure am!
When I sat down to ponder my life and wait on the Lord for fresh promises and words of hope at the end of 2012, I had no idea all that would transpire over the coming 365 days. Honestly, if you would have told me what would happen in 2013 for Edgar and I, there's a good chance I would not have believed you...
I wouldn't have believed that my husband would get laid off from his job...
...that we would have to sell the lovely home we had just built...
...that we would leave [yet another] precious community of amazing friends...
...that we would move back "home" to Dallas...
...that our adoption would be postponed longer than we ever imagined...
...that we would get to be part of our beloved Gateway Church again...
...that we would hear God tell us to begin fostering...!
...that we would get a puppy...!
This year has been full of some of the highest highs and the lowest lows we have ever walked through. But for each goodbye, there has been a hello. For each closed door, there has been an open door just around the corner. For each tear, there have been smiles to far outweigh the heartache.
And on this first day of January, the first day of this brand new year, I can't help but realize how God is shifting things in our lives. He has brought Edgar and I into a place where we are doing the very things we said we would "NEVER" do! That would be a good theme for us for 2013: shifting and shaking everything that could possibly be shaken and bringing us into Never Never Land. And in the shifting, in that testing, He does new and beautiful things that we can hardly comprehend.
So we have had a few new things going on over here... The first is that we did indeed get a brand new little puppy! She is the biggest surprise of our lives because Edgar and I were the couple that had said we would "never" get a dog. And I can hardly even grasp how it happened, all I know is that we saw her and instantly fell in love and knew she was supposed to be our dog. And trust me, we were just as shocked as our family and close friends were! We named her Schatje which means "little treasure" in Dutch, and our sweet little Schatje is the gift we never knew we needed.
But of far greater significance...we have begun the process of becoming foster parents...!
"What?!" you say? That's exactly what we said too when we first realized it. Become foster parents? Who in their right mind wants to do that? Fostering was yet another thing I "never" wanted to do. Can you imagine loving children as your very own only to have them ripped from you with barely a moments notice? Fostering children sounded like the most profoundly painful heartache and I was not in the least bit interested in voluntarily putting myself through that kind of pain...
But God has a way of shifting things in our lives and hearts in such a strategic way and He brings it all about in His perfect timing. From where I sit now, having a heart freshly shattered by His love (and also partly because of this book), I cannot imagine being more excited and passionate about fostering than I am now. What a precious opportunity to love on children, to help them find healing and to shepherd their precious hearts for however long God gives them to us.
A few weeks ago we began the process of "foster-to-adopt" with a local agency and this month we will start the required 30+ hours of required training. What does "foster-to-adopt" mean? We will take a child or a sibling group into our home while their parents work on meeting whatever requirements CPS has set up for them to earn their kids back. The average time foster children stay in a foster home under this scenario is 12-18 months. If at the end of this time the parents have been unable/unwilling to live up to the requirements CPS gave them, their parental rights will be terminated and we will be able to adopt the child/children.
Are we still adopting our little child from Uganda? YES. Though the wait has become longer than anyone anticipated and several families above us have dropped out of the program (putting us now at #21 on the waiting list) we feel like God has told us to stick it out and continue trusting Him with Uganda.
With all that said, my mind short circuits whenever I try to picture what 2014 could look like. I can't help but think that our God wants to do so much more in each of our lives this coming year than ever before. I believe He wants to pour Himself out in greater ways than we have ever experienced, that He wants to give us fresh faith and hope in who He is. I want each of us to believe Him more than we ever dreamed possible.
But that is often our problem: belief. Have you ever struggled with belief? with faith? with hope? Perhaps because you have been disappointed when you hoped for something...or maybe God didn't seem to come through for you when you cried out to Him. I don't know why you might struggle with belief from time to time, but I can say that I'm right there with you in the struggle.
My constant prayer is "Lord, I do believe! and please help my unbelief!" Have you ever prayed that?
Mary and Martha believed Jesus would heal their brother. The disciples believed Jesus would heal Lazarus. Yet oddly, Jesus delayed in arriving on the scene. After waiting until it was "too late", Jesus told His disciples in John 11, "Lazarus died. And I am glad for your sakes that I wasn't there. You're about to be given new grounds for believing..." Sometimes we can't explain why God delays in answering our prayers or why He goes about it not directly but by taking the long way around, but I do know that no matter what you are believing God for, He is faithful and He will always do what He says He will do.
Instead of giving them an instant miracle, Jesus takes Mary and Martha and His disciples on the long way around. To frustrate and disappoint them? NO! To set the stage for glorifying the Father and building their faith. The faith and awe and adoration that grew in their hearts for Jesus after seeing Lazarus raised from the dead was so much richer and deeper and eternal than if Jesus had simply showed up "on time" and healed Lazarus while he was yet living.
"Then Jesus looked her in the eye, 'Didn't I tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?"' (John 11:40) Friends, look with me into the eyes of Jesus and let's hear Him telling us that... Let's put our faith in the One who makes all things new, the One who brings the prodigals home and sets the captives free, the One who places the lonely in families and heals the brokenhearted. Let's break out of our "never" boxes and let Him do fresh things, new things in our lives. Don't you want to believe Him for more this year than ever before??!
From our little family to yours, we wish you love, we wish you peace, we wish you joy in this New Year as we celebrate all that means most to us. Our reason to celebrate and rejoice in these holy-days has been because Jesus Christ humbled Himself and came to earth to ransom us and restore life and hope to all of humanity. It is because of His life that we now have life, and not just any life, but an ABUNDANT life of great joy and hope.
We have hope in our future because we have hope in Him.
Here's to 2014!
